Blogzored!
I've become aware that I'm the only person on Earth who actually posts in this blog. Several people have the ability to, but they just don't. Ever. I guess they have nothing to say. Not like me. I always have something random or stupid to talk about. After all, weren't blogs invented so that people could post random crap on the internet? What other use is there? Maybe it can be used as a personal journal, but I don't think that's a good idea. I cannot stress this enough - the internet is not a good place to post personal thoughts and feelings. Especially if they are personal thoughts and feelings could cause drama if certain people read them. For example, teenage girls.
Teenage girls like to post about boys they like and about all the drama that goes with being a teenage girl. Since boys and drama are the only things that make up a teenage girls' life, their blogs are usually unbearably boring and long. They think that everyone wants to read about their heartache over the boy who they liked for a day before he talked once with their best friend, ending any chance at happiness or relationships between any of the parties involved. Life is pure cruelty. Rather than having a sit-down with their remaining girlfriends, they run home as fast as they can after school to post about it. What ensues is a radical exchange of witless banter that can only be described as "stupid." Schoolmates will hear a rumor at school, then check the blogging circuit ASAP to get the low-down on what the haps is. Then sides start getting taken, more friendships end, and at the end of the day the mother (who is surprisingly internet coherent) who asks the daughter how the situation is going gets yelled at because apparently posting on a blog means that you own that part of the internet and people aren't allowed to read it unless they have express written permission.
Needless to say, teenage girls are really dumb. And despite that fact that they make up a large part of the blogging community, they don't offer anything to that community other than a huge waste of time. Which is slightly less than what they offer to real communities. Because in real communities, they are free labor.
Teenage girls like to post about boys they like and about all the drama that goes with being a teenage girl. Since boys and drama are the only things that make up a teenage girls' life, their blogs are usually unbearably boring and long. They think that everyone wants to read about their heartache over the boy who they liked for a day before he talked once with their best friend, ending any chance at happiness or relationships between any of the parties involved. Life is pure cruelty. Rather than having a sit-down with their remaining girlfriends, they run home as fast as they can after school to post about it. What ensues is a radical exchange of witless banter that can only be described as "stupid." Schoolmates will hear a rumor at school, then check the blogging circuit ASAP to get the low-down on what the haps is. Then sides start getting taken, more friendships end, and at the end of the day the mother (who is surprisingly internet coherent) who asks the daughter how the situation is going gets yelled at because apparently posting on a blog means that you own that part of the internet and people aren't allowed to read it unless they have express written permission.
Needless to say, teenage girls are really dumb. And despite that fact that they make up a large part of the blogging community, they don't offer anything to that community other than a huge waste of time. Which is slightly less than what they offer to real communities. Because in real communities, they are free labor.
posted by Micah Haughey at 5:48 PM
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